your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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