Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
