Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize
