Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
