i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
where are my pants?
in the oven.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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