Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
