I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
