Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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