once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
