It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
