There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
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