Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
