I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Can I color on your dick again?
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
