It's like God shit irony all over that family
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
