I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
