I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
