so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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