12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
