a queef is a wish your heart makes.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Randomize
