therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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