I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
BRING THE BAGELS
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
