I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Randomize
