I must be too annoying 4 u.
Screwed.edu
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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