U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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