i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
