Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize