So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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