hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
