We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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