So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Randomize
