I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
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