So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
