thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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