is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
