Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
that's an acceptable place to lick
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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