Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
