Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
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