I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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