why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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