Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
