omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize