allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
