Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Boobs speak an international language.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
How drunk are you?
Completed.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
