I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
