i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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