I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
