I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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