did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Randomize
