the new term for farting is butt boxing.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize
