if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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