Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
