Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
